Talking to Yourself. Internal Dialogue
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Talking to Yourself. Internal Dialogue.
We all talk to ourselves all the time, some people are not even aware of it however, we all do it. It is one of the ways that we make sense of the world and for many people it is how they really mess themselves up. When we ask a client , How do you do that? a good question to ask when someone says that they are unhappy, stressed, anxious in fear or worried.
The first response is usually I don't know, after a bit of playing around and joking they normally say things like, "well I tell my self".
Isn't that cool they get all worked up stressed, continue to smoke or overeat, or mess up relationships, because of what they tell themselves and often make up. Sometimes you also hear things like well "I work my self up into a state".
We all listen to what we tell ourselves, and act upon what we tell ourselves, even if it is something we make up. This is our internal dialogue, our little friends in our own mind that talk to, advised and direct what we do and how we are.
It is our conscience, the little devils or angles that sit on our shoulders and talk to us and make us saints or sinners and if you are lucky allow you to have "paradoxical personalities".
I love internal dialogues and sometimes higher things do seam to come through, intuition or other messages from a possible more advanced source. Most people are unable to access or listen to these other knowledgable voices due to the total crap that they are running in their head.
Your subconscious control mind also advises you through your little voices, that part of you that really runs the show, uses internal dialogue to communicate, advise, warn you, or tell you it has a glitch that needs your attention. Little warning lights that flash, all they are telling you is that you need to do something about this Now.
Your internal dialogues, you do have more than one, are also part of the feedback loop and relationship that you have with yourselves, again more than one. Your self love, self respect, self esteem, self confidence and self concept. So this auditory modality has a big part to play in how well you enjoy your life or how much you mess it up.
Yet, unless you have practical experience of neuro linguistic programming, emotional freedom therapy, design human engineering or are very good at self hypnosis, a student of huna or an advanced raja yoga practitioner, you have little or no understanding that "your internal dialogue will shape your life".
With a little knowledge and practice you can fill your mind with lovely voices, voices that help and encourage you, voices that give you good sound practical advice from a source that is more powerful than anything you have yet experienced. You will also become something that will change your life forever. "Your Own Best Friend".
With practice you can learn how to turn off negative internal dialogues and fix the problems behind them, take away the drivers or fix the underlying problem and they will stop.
Most relationship difficulties are the result of negative internal dialogue as are almost all cases of confidence issues, low self esteem and depression. Most of our fears and self limiting behaviours are also just little warning lights that are flashing, “excuse me, may I have your attention”.
Once this is done you can build "positive internal dialogue". They will encourage and support you and help you to achieve what your desire in life. It is almost like having the most encouraging and loving people aways surrounding you, helping and guiding and encouraging you. Gone will be the pathetic little voices that said "I can’t, It’s hard, What if I fail? and all the host of excuses that most people make up.
Then you develop "realistic internal dialogue". That’s a real fun thing to do, your reality checker and common sense is on. It does not mean that every thing is honky dory,
At this stage your own best friend comes in to play, you no longer beat yourself up over silly mistakes or failures. You will however get a voice that says things like. OK what can we learn from that. What's the lesson here. What's good about this, or could be? How can we improve. What will we do different next time. Have we considered.
When you find yourself in a situation where you do not want to take the required action, instead of confusion and worry, it may simply say something like. Ok you know you have to do this, so is it you don’t want to, in which case that is your decision to suffer, and you are aware of all the pain that will bring. Fine by me, stay a victim.
Or is it a case of you do not yet know how to? In which case we can ask, find out, research or even pay someone to do it for us. This kind of internal dialogue free from all the negative emotions fears, anxiety worry and confusion make a huge difference in your life.